If I didn’t have Shelby

I wouldn’t have known I was capable

of selfless maternal love

 

If I didn’t have Kira

I wouldn’t have known my heart’s capacity

to heal after profound loss

 

I also wouldn’t have known

the canine equivalent of Lucille Ball

 

“She can dance, she can sing,

she can make your belly hurt with laughter

with just a twitch of her face…”

 

If I didn’t have Luna

I wouldn’t have known

The Queen of Tennis Balls,

or that a dog could will you to take the boat out

so that she could swim one more time

unencumbered by shoreline

 

I also wouldn’t have seen my father so delighted

by a dog that sat by his feet and lovingly stared

into his Pied Piper eyes

 

If I didn’t have Charlie Brown,

I would have continued to watch another dog suffer

from the absence of her sidekick

 

I also would have never fully understood 

the importance of companionship to the canine spirit

 

If I didn’t have Seamus

I might have lain frozen in the snow

dead just one day after my 50th birthday

 

I also wouldn’t have understood the key role

dogs and cats play in our everyday survival

 

When I struggled to will myself through another day,

they gave me reason to get up every morning and carry on

 

If I didn’t have Ceara

I wouldn’t have known the joy of blended family

or the happy mayhem of having three amigos (or stooges) at one time

 

If I didn’t have Tessa

I wouldn’t have had a purebred dog from puppyhood,

being able to imprint on her from the start

all the love and security she would need to feel whole

 

If I didn’t have Van Gogh

I would have a huge hole

where all his macho exuberance takes up residence and 

keeps me on my toes

 

I remember the losses well, but I remember the bounty more

as it should be…

The chain stronger than its individual parts,

each circle unbroken by death or time

indelible love and memories forever mine